Viet-Justice

The less than brilliant pro-censorship people at American Family Association are part of the fools behind a campaign against the Carl’s Jr. commercial featuring Paris Hilton. We can also blame the less than brilliant people at the Parents Television Council for jumping on the anti-capitalist bandwagon as well. Carl’s Jr. is not apologizing for at all for the commercial which makes them a strong buy both in food and in stock. I want to see more of these commercials and anti-capitalistic idiots like AFA and PTC sell their televisions. We don’t need organizations such as these getting in the way of the free market. Then again I guess they would rather have us eat at Al-Qaeda Burger than at Carl’s Jr.

I think I’ll start a chain of restaurants called Burqua Burger where all the employees wear burquas so we can make money off the Christian Taliban. There can also be religious events in the kitchen such as “Flame Broil the Infidels At The Stake” or “Bake Ze Non-Believers In Mein Oven”. Boiling in oil is out since fried foods are bad for you and Jesus doesn’t want you to do bad things.

The folks at the American Family ASSociation have declared war on Ford for donating $1000 of every Jaguar and Land Rover sold to the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Discrimination. All I can say is that that boycotts are about as smart as the people that stage them. The economy is barely recovering and now we want to boycott an American company? People who don’t want to burn in hell will have to buy Peugeots now.

This takes me back to the days of seeing bumperstickers on an old beat up car that say “Buy American” or “Drive a Japanese Car & Put 3 Americans Out Of Work”. What will we see today? Here are a few starters.

“Chevy: The Heart Beat of Christian America”
“Drive a Ford, Take It Up The Ass and Burn In Hell”

Well it’s been said. Now there is a terrorist connection with piracy. Granted this is piracy of movies in flea market settings, but I am quite confident that the MPAA will say that P2P is a tool of Al-Qaeda. For some reason the current administration is very interested in invading our privacy in cyberspace under the guise of fighting terrorism. I wonder what the endgame is here.

In the past few weeks the news has been flooded with various states determining that sex offenders have been getting Viagra on the taxpayer’s dollar. A typical mistake by the government that is now being corrected. The question I ask is should we stop giving Viagra to sex offenders?

News this week is that Viagra and other drugs may cause blindness. The medical community should research this more to pinpoint exactly when it happens so we can better determine which sex offenders to give these drugs to. Think of the benefit to society by blinding the sex offenders. It should tip the scales in favor of any potential victim in the future for obvious reasons. It can also give some sense of justice to the victims of these creeps since the criminal justice system doesn’t issue harsh punishment compared to what the victim endured. Yes, an eye for an eye and two for a tooth. Viagra induced blindness is an ironic punishment for sex offenders since they’re trying to enhance themselves, but end up blind and less able to use their enhancement. The best part is they did it by their own free will. Much less messy than friends and relatives of the victim gouging the offender’s eyes out when he is released from prison and in some ways more satisfying.

At first I was outraged that sex offenders were receiving Viagra with my tax money. Now I’m less outraged and more amused. This also opens the market for more seeing eye dogs, which is bad for criminals and good for capitalism. I’m sure there will be a big market selling seeing eye Pit Bulls to blind sex offenders.

The feds are asking an appeals court to restore its ability to force ISPs to turn over information about subscribers as part of the war on terror. This is getting out of hand. The next thing we know file sharing or saying something unfavorable about the government on a messagboard will become Terrorism. Not to say anyone would come after you for your opinions, but do you really want them to know who all of your online aliases are linked back to?

Terrorists have murdered Japanese citizen Akihiko Saito in Iraq. Mr. Saito was serving with a British security company and was captured last month. Let us take a moment to honor him and Asians everywhere serving in Iraq.

Eagleville High School Valedictorian Abe Stoklasa decided to give an amusing speech where he made the following statement.

“You have given us the minimum required attention and education to master any station at any McDonald’s anywhere. For that we thank you. Of course, I’m only kidding. Eagleville is a fine institute of higher learning, with superb faculty and staff.”

Not a bad gradutaion speech if I do say so myself. Now what makes it really silly is that school officials have decided to withold his diploma. Could it be that Principal Rhonda Holton has absolutely no sense of humor? When are school administrators going to get over the power trip of controlling young people? I guess all that “southerness” has really helped the intelligence of the people running the place. Hopefully the graduating class of 2005 is much smarter than other people from their Tennessee town. Remember folks, public schools are dangerous. Don’t send your kids to this one.

Eagleville High School
500 Highway 99
Eagleville, TN 37060
615-274-6336

Principal Rhonda Holton
Assistant Principal Bill Tollett

The FTC is going to start asking ISP’s to shut down residential customer’s computers that are infected with spamware. This is a wonderful first step in keeping this junk from making it to our mailboxes. Sure it is bound to upset a lot of non-technical users, but they can go to CompUSA or Geek Squad and have the problem taken care of if they can’t figure out how to remove the spamware themselves. Besides, you can’t expect to have a car without paying for maintenance. Why expect to have a computer maintenance free if you’re not a computer person?

The US government has withdrawn a controversial clause requiring countries and organizations seeking US AIDS assistance to publicly condemn prostitution. The clause applied not only to groups hoping to receive direct US AIDS aid, but also to those receiving funding from multinational organizations to which the US contributes.

If the anti-prostitution pledge had remained intact, it would have meant that 3,000 groups working in 128 countries would have had to condemn prostitution in order to continue receiving financial support under the Bush initiative.

Fortunately the US decided to withdraw this silly measure. If this country intends to offer aid an assistance to others we should not be basing it on how they run their internal affairs. Charity is something that should be given freely, not with strings attached. Too bad certain conservative groups don’t see the true meaning of charity. Perhaps they should go back to church and study Christ’s message of love thy neigbor.

GWB has decided that he is going to veto any changes to legislation that would potentially provide medical assistance to Americans with an illness. This is troubling in many aspects. For some reason the President feels that people should continue to suffer. While the President tries to look out for the best interest of America, I believe he is shorting all of us in the long run. South Korea is planning to expand its stem cell research program. If GWB does not allow this legislation to go through, then other countries will continue to out maneuver us. It is fitting that an Asian country would put research ahead of religious zealotry.